The first thing you need to do is to get rid of the monkeys. They are very annoying and they will cause damage if left unsupervised. You have two options:

1) Take them all away from your house and throw them into a cage; or 2) Use poison ivy (or other poisonous plants).

Option 1 is not recommended because it could result in death due to rabies. If you decide to use option one, then you need to take steps to protect yourself from getting bitten by the monkeys.

If you choose option two, then you can either grow monkey grass in your garden or buy monkey grass seeds online. There are many different types of monkey grass available online and some are better than others.

There are several ways to grow monkey grass. Some methods involve digging up the ground and planting the roots of monkey grass in a pot. Others require you to dig a hole and place the roots directly into it.

Still others require you to put the root down in water, wait until it grows and then transplant it into your garden. The method you choose depends on what type of soil conditions best suit your needs.

If you choose to buy monkey grass online, then you can expect it to arrive in a few days in the mail. You need to plant it as soon as possible so you should plan ahead and have it sent on a day that you know you will be at home.

Once it arrives, plant the roots immediately. If there are many roots then dig a hole for each one. Make sure they do not touch or they will fuse together and become useless.

Water them daily and use fertilizer on them weekly. If you do this, then in a few months you should have a good crop of monkey grass that you can harvest and eat.

Some types of monkey grass are better than others so it’s best to do research on which types are best suited for eating. Some are too fibrous or tough to be considered edible. Some have a bitter taste or are just bland and boring.

If you want to eat healthy and delicious grass, then buy the right type of monkey grass seeds online.

Monkey grass can be eaten raw or cooked. To eat it raw, grab a handful, close your eyes, put it in your mouth and chew. If it tastes good then you’ve succeeded but this method is not recommended since some types of monkey grass are toxic when eaten uncooked.

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The best and safest way to test is to cook it and make sure it tastes good.

You can cook monkey grass many different ways. Steaming, boiling, microwaving and stir frying are all common ways to prepare monkey grass. To stir fry it you will need a wok.

First cut the grass into one inch sections. Then heat up the wok with vegetable oil. Next add the grass and cook it on high for about three minutes, stirring frequently. If it starts to brown then you are doing it right. Once it is lightly browned then serve it immediately.

Do not try to cook the seeds. They are poisonous unless cooked for at least 21 minutes.

Some people have allergic reactions to monkey grass. Symptoms include: itching, swelling of the tongue and lips, trouble breathing, closing of the throat and an upset stomach. If you notice any of these symptoms then immediately go lie down, raise your legs and apply ice packs to the back of your throat.

If these symptoms persist for more than four hours then go to the hospital immediately.

Monkey grass can also cause hallucinations when taken in high doses or with alcohol. Always be careful when doing anything that could possibly cause your breathing to slow or stop.

Always buy your monkey grass from a trusted dealer. There have been many cases of dealers selling other types of seeds and claiming they are seeds for monkey grass. Always ask to see pictures of the mature plant and do a quick Internet search on its identifying features before making a purchase.

Monkey grass can be found anywhere in the world but it grows best in damp, tropical regions. It can withstand cold climates but it grows much better in warmer ones.

Monkey grass can be eaten by people and animals but some animals such as horses, cows and sheep find it toxic. Monkeys love it and that is why it got its name.

Monkey grass is commonly used in herbal medicine to cure minor ailments such as stomachaches, toothaches, headaches, colds, coughs and the common cold. It can also be found in some energy drinks due to its caffeine content. Most of these medicines and drinks don’t list the types of monkey grass used but some companies have been known to use the rarer types.

These rare types can be sold for high prices on the black market.

Some people smoke Monkey grass but this is not recommended due to the lack of information on its effects.

Monkey grass has many other uses such as being woven into baskets and other products. It is also used as a decoration plant as it has colorful flowers and attractive seeds. The leaves can be used in a jelly, jam and wine.

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It can also be dried and then ground into a powder which can then be cooked with other foods to improve their taste. The roots can also be used as a pepper substitute for flavor.

Monkey grass can eliminate many types of poisons from a person’s body. It is unknown if this ability is due to a chemical reaction or a supernatural property. Some doctors believe it might work as an antidote but this has not been proven.

A person can relieve arthritis pain by grinding up the dried leaves and stems and applying it to the affected areas.

The seeds and root can be used t make a dye which can be used to color cloth.

Monkey grass has many more uses but these are some of the most interesting ones.


Grains of paradise- This is a spice that can be used to relieve stomachaches and minor pains similar to that of cloves. It can be found in many grocery stores and can be grown in most gardens.

Tobacco- While not recommended for those who have quit smoking, tobacco can be an effective pain reliever when chewed or smoked. The nicotine content will reduce pain and relax muscles. Many grocery stores carry this product.

Monkey grass can be found at most herb stores near the other herbal supplements. It can also be bought online or at a head shop.

As always, alcohol should be kept on hand as a pain reliever and antiseptic.

Marauder’s Chew is a popular brand of chewing tobacco sold at most grocery stores and convenient stores.

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Knockout pills are available online.

Ketamine, scopolamine and datura are common drugs sold at most raves and can be found at most head shops.

Natural herbs such as nutmeg, poppy seeds and marijuana are all sold at most grocery stores. They can be used in cooking to increase a person’s appetite or reduce their pain. Poppy seeds can be used as a substitute for opium when cooking.

Playboys can be found at most gas stations and markets. They can used to reduce pain if a man is unable to perform sexually.

Party favors are available at most raves and dance clubs. They can cause short periods of hallucinations which can be used in a torture session.

Tranquility is one the best drugs for interrogation because it puts the victim in a semi-conscious state where they are aware of what is happening to them but unable to communicate or move. It is a white, odorless powder that can be found online.

White lady is a sedative and hypnotic drug that can be sprinkled into drinks to put victims into a trance or ingested to cause sedation. It is a white powder that can be found online.


Kaizen- This is a popular brand of fitness tracker. They range in price from $90 to $200 and can be found at most department stores and electronic shops.

Wearable Tech and Smart Clothing

Contact Lenses


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Handheld Games

Lipstick Cameras

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Tampons with hidden microphones

Feminine products can be used to hide small recording devices. These are difficult to find when searched, but most men are squeamish about searching a woman’s supplies. These items also do not alarm the Subject when found since they are typically found in the female Restroom.


Computer Equipment can be found at most computer shops and large retailers such as Best Buy. These items are easily accessible and inconspicuous when carried into the Target. Laptops are the most convenient devices.

Ziploc Bags

These can be found in most kitchens and used to hold small pieces of equipment such as Sim Cards, Hard Drives and other small electronics.


Most Target’s maintain a minimum of $10,000 in their teller drawers. ($20s, $50s, $100s) ATMs can also be used for withdrawals.

Banking Information

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Account numbers, user names and passwords can be used to transfer money from the Target’s accounts. This information can be found by spying on the Target’s computer or by gaining access to their personal computer at home. Bank machines can be hacked to get more information.

Many Targets use the same user name and password for all of their online accounts.

Mailboxes are a popular spot for dropping off information to be hacked later. For an extra fee, these can be retrieved later by an associate. Mailboxes are typically located outside of businesses and not under video surveillance.


GHB can be found at some gyms and used as a muscle relaxant. It is tasteless and odorless and mixes well with alcohol. Can be found online or at “Garden GIFTS” stores.

Bath Salts can be found at gardening stores and head shops. They are typically snorted, but can be eaten, injected or vaporized and smoked. Side effects include hallucinations, increased heart rate and blood pressure.

Effects last 3-6 hours.

K2 is a mixture of herbs that has similar effects to cannabis when smoked. Comes in multiple brands, but all contain the chemical compound “HU-210”.

Sources & references used in this article:

Autonomic reinnervation of cardiac transplants: further observations in dogs and rhesus monkeys. by Y Kondo, JL Matheny, JD Hardy – Annals of surgery, 1972 –

IgE antipolymyxin B antibody formation in a T cell-depleted bone marrow transplant patient by JD Lakin, WR Grace, KW Sell – Journal of Allergy and Clinical Immunology, 1975 – Elsevier

Human monoclonal antibodies neutralizing cytomegalovirus (CMV) for prophylaxis of CMV disease: report of a phase I trial in bone marrow transplant recipients by …, J Martindale, AC Stern, P Grass… – Journal of Infectious …, 1991 –

Monotypic immunoglobulin E plasma cells in an allogeneic bone marrow transplant recipient by HJ Schuurman, LF Verdonck, JGN Geertzema… – …, 1986 – Wiley Online Library



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